Wherein I use the F word, but I'm just quoting someone else so don't get offended, and also say Open a can of whoop ass, so feel free to make fun.

I haven't been so tired in ages. I just got back from four long days, each one more interesting than the next. And by interesting, I mean shitty.

I had a great crew. I can't complain one bit about that. We laughed, hid maxi pads in various spots throughout the galley, and laughed some more. Good times.

But the guests. Oh my god the guests. The first day wasn't anyone's fault... A guy (an employee actually) had a mini seizure. The lady next to him rang the call button, said "there's something wrong with this guy", and the guy was all spaced out and shaking, and then he snapped out of it and had no idea what had just happened. We were 25 minutes from landing. Hectic. The guy was fine (well as fine as you can be when you've just had your first ever seizure), we landed, got him some medical attention, and that was that. Day one over.

The next day was just really long. LONG long. Across the country twice long.

The next day, we were in the back galley when we heard someone scream "WHORES! FUCKING WHORES!!" We looked around at each other, almost to wonder if we had imagined it, but no, we hadn't, since we had all heard it. I was ready to whip out a can of whoop ass, since I just finished my self defense training and was all eager to test it out on someone, but alas, I didn't get to. We found out who it was, and realized that the guy in fact had Tourette's, and wasn't actually verbally abusing us. I was super awkward though, and it made for an interesting flight.

Today was the weirdest. A girl travelling alone (but who was over the age of unaccompanied minors so had no real care from us) basically spilled her guts to me after I asked her "how are you today?" and told me that yesterday she ran away from home, called CSI on her dad because he said someone was dying and she thought it was him and now she's going to meet her brother who she doesn't know (and doesn't know what he looks like but don't worry he knows what SHE looks like) and stay with him till this thing blows over. (Those are her words). I was obviously concerned that a) she was running away now and her dad didn't know she was flying somewhere and b) that some creeper was going to pick her up and it wasn't her brother and she would get raped and murdered and it was all my fault. It was a huge long ordeal that I won't get into, but in the end we contacted the dad, found out she had behavioural problems, he has health problems and can't deal with her, and her brother who is an adult with his own children is going to help with the situation for a bit. We got the info of the brother, and decided we'd go down and meet the brother with her and check his ID. I basically felt horribly uncomfortable through the whole ordeal, desperately hoped that this guy was going to be a decent human being and that I wouldn't get the "NO!" feeling when I met him. It was ALL good in the end, the brother had two adorable children of his own, thanked us for bringing her down, and I felt really good about it. I just really really hope this girl will turn out ok. She was obviously lacking attention from the adults in her life and needed some guidance. I hope she gets it.

I was so emotionally exhausted by this situation, I just wanted to come home. Lucky for me I got to. So I'm home. And I'm happy about it.